Two days left!

2012 is two days left.

People made themselves busy with makin' some new year resolutions. I used to be that kind of person. But lately I know that it's kinda useless. I mean, every year I always make at least 4 new year resolutions and somehow it didn't work out on me. I live my life as it goes, I can't stuck on some wishes and silly goals I made on the day I want it to be happened. I can possibly don't want it anymore in the middle of the year, who knows?

On January I made 6 2011 goals, and know what? Just two of them that practically happened. I was failed to get in Science class, I was failed to join the biggest basketball tournament in my country and should patiently wait next year for my turn, and I completely failed to decrease my weight. And I didn't feel like a happier person this year. Well, let's get some flashbacks about this year. I've got tons of bad moments, and also the good ones.

This year my beloved uncle, my mom's the only brother, passed away. That's the worst thing that happened to me this year. Losing someone you adore, you love, close to you, be there for you and every single family member, someone who being so great, so nice, how could it be not bad? He's gone all of sudden. I wish you get the best place beside Allah SWT, om. We miss you already :)

Did I mention that I was failed to get in Science class? Well, yes, I was. But that's not definitely the end of the world. Social class is not as bad as I thought it would be. My classmates in XI Social 2 are nice, but yeah, there are some annoying classmates too. Get in Social class means no pressure. Eventho all of the subjects are definitely not my thing, like Economy.. Sociology.. geez, I was their #1 hater, but compare to Science class which is full of pressure if your brain not capable of it... Social class is good enough and giving you much time to enjoy your time in high school (no offense all of Science class' members! :p). And I made it to the first rank in the end of the first semester in Social class. First rank! yaaaaay! Such a great welcome, Social class!

I turned 16 on September. I realized the older I am, the better I should be. It's time to think and planning my future. What am I gonna do after graduated? Which University will I take? It somehow struggling all over my head. I'm accepting people's opinions. I know it's time to make my own decision, no matter am I ready or not.

I wanna thank God for keeping my family and all my besties safe. I'm really grateful to having them all around me and get their supports whenever I need it. I always mention their names everytime I pray, asking God to let them stay near me, wishing they enjoying their lives, and they keep loving and supporting me. Especially mom. We fight and argue a lot. But I can't imagine life without her. Without her there is no me. She is the strongest woman I ever known. She mad at me most of the times cz we rarely have the same sight of things, we don't have the same taste of fashion and foods, me and my mom just... different. But I love her, and she loves me too.

And this is last flashback I wanna share, but not least.

You.
Thank you for all the good memories you gave me. Five months may not be long, but I guess it's long enough for me to learn. Learn that the one who changed me is not always the one will be long lasting with me. Learn that love isn't enough for a commitment, it including faith, and everything else. Thank you for those tears you put on my cheeks, and all the wounds. It makes me stronger.
Thank you for the best birthday surprise ever. You made the day I'm turning fifteen completely perfect. I will never forget the day when you came over and asking me out. Thank you for the attention. Maybe Rihanna is right about the boy who would make us feel like we are the only girl in the world. Well, with all your attention, you did makin' me feel like I'm the only girl in this world.
Thank you for a few last words at that night you told me. When you said you will love me like forever, and eventho I knew sooner or later it will be... just words, but at least it makes me feel better that night. And yes, the next three months everything becomes like you never say those words to me, and I've been replaced.
How I wish what happened in 1st March is never exist.